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A nation of dog eaters – Britain through the BBC’s looking glass


WITH the nation’s morale at something of a low point, it has fallen to the state broadcaster, the BBC, to calm nerves and exemplify the wartime adage ‘Keep Calm and Carry On’. For those who missed last week’s Breakfast broadcast on BBC1, here is the transcript.

Presenter: Now, we are going to cross over to our reporter Hugh Jass who is at a market in Warrington for us today. Hugh, you’ve been talking to shoppers about the economic crisis and the effects it is having on them. It looks cold up there, what have they been telling you?

HJ: (Laughing) Yes, that’s right, it is a bit cooler than you’d expect at this time of year, but that is climate change in action. I’ve been here all morning gauging the mood of a cross section of people to discover how the Government orchestrated financial cataclysm has impacted them. It’s a tale of hardship, make no mistake, a tale of unbelievable misery and privation. (Walking a few steps) Let’s take a moment to talk with John who I spoke to earlier this morning. John, you run a small shop on the High Street.

John: (Nervously looks at camera) Yes, well, I run an independent knit-your-own-yurt business.

HJ: Tell me how you are coping with the price of fuel escalating out of control and the fact that food is a luxury commodity for the pampered elite. I would imagine that you cannot afford to heat your home and put food on the table, courtesy of the grotesquely mis-managed and self-serving policies of the fascist junta in Downing Street.

John: Well, we have certainly had to tighten our belts a bit, but hasn’t everyone? I am sure we will muddle through somehow.’

HJ: I have heard from people that they have had to slaughter much-loved family pets to survive, have you experienced anything like that?

John: (looks serious) No, I have not heard that at all and I certainly don’t know anyone who has been reduced to that.

HJ: Like many, I presume that you are having to boil twigs to make some type of thin gruel to survive.

John: (looks alarmed) No, I can still afford the odd tin of cream of tomato, thankfully.

HJ: You say thankfully, but no thanks to the Government who seem content to ignore the ordinary people up and down the land who are literally struggling to survive. People who must make the stark choice of heat or eat. Is this a choice that you are familiar with?

John: No, not really. As I said earlier, we are cutting our cloth accordingly and have made a few sacrifices to make sure we can get by. We pop the heating on a little later and turn it off a bit earlier, we wear cardigans in the evening and use an electric blanket, they’re very economical. My wife cooks batches of food at one time and freezes dishes that we can use later. Sometimes we use less favoured cuts of meat, but slow cooking has been a revelation. We drive a bit less than we used to as well, that saves us a bit of money too.

HJ: So there you have it. Britain is a broken country where the poor are reduced to relying on food banks and eating dogs to survive. An impoverished country where the masses are forgotten about. This is a scandal that should shame everyone connected to Downing Street. With winter round the corner, it can only be a matter of time before people are found in their thousands, emaciated or frozen in their own homes. We talk about North Korea and how tough life is there for residents, but quite frankly, if they came here, they would be clamouring to get back on the first flight to Pyongyang. Back to you in the studio.

Presenter: Thanks Hugh, what a terrible indictment of the callous Cabinet that runs the country. Now, something a little more light-hearted: we look behind the scenes at Strictly and how they are going Net Zero on sequins.

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Alexander McKibbin
Alexander McKibbin
Alexander McKibbin is a retired media executive who worked across domestic and international media.

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