After a decade-long downward trend, domestic abuse figures could spike next year following the introduction in 2015 of a new offence, ‘coercive and controlling behaviour’. Professor Nicole Westmarland, director of the Durham University Centre for Research into Violence and Abuse, said that a large proportion of domestic abuse is being hidden, and she expects to see an increase, particularly in terms of the abuse of women.

This redefinition of domestic abuse to include non-violent behaviour is likely to deflect attention from domestic abuse suffered by males, who accounted for 713,000 out of 1.9 million victims in the year ending March 2017. However, according to a 2010 National Intimate Partner and Sexual Violence Survey by the US Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, cases of violence involving lesbian couples in the US exceeded almost all other categories, with an incidence of 43.8 per cent – second highest after bisexual women (61.1 per cent), but way ahead of heterosexual women (35 per cent). Lesbian partnerships contribute disproportionately to the tally of domestic violence since they constitute only a tiny fraction of all relationships; but while the victims are women, so are the perpetrators.

Overall there’s no doubt that the problem of domestic abuse is enormous, but instead of addressing it in all its dimensions, it is likely to be ‘weaponised’ in the diversity wars to demonstrate that all perpetrators are men, and all victims women. If this is indeed the case, the problem can only get bigger.


  1. Its a well known fact that feminists only care about the crimes committed by men, white men to be precise.

    Crimes committed by women and non white men, are never ever mentioned by feminists who just happen coincidentally to overwhelmingly upper class, white and female.

    The recent salem witch trials in parliament, were all directed at white men. Meanwhile, washing machine repair man Keith Vaz who was purchasing rent boys and class A’s from his house brought in £50 notes totalling £350,000 earned from his work as an MP, was missing from the “scandal”. Keith Vaz is a man, but erm, not the right kind to get outraged against.

    Another notable exception from the salem witch trials was Ambert Rudd’s inappropriate work place relationship with a male colleague. It was an actual relationship, which is more than any of the white males managed to achieve in the “scandal”. Well one of them did touch a knee 15 years ago.

    So if we are to take anything from the salem witch trials do not be a white male and work anywhere close to feminists, because you are a target. Sharia May and Amber Rudd are definitely feminists, along with the likes of Jess Phillips who laughs at male suicide.

    • Correct , it’s anti white male only which confirms what we all suspect that it’s not really about real domestic violence issues , but another chance to demonise men and grab some power . They wouldn’t dare show a non white male abusing a white female .

    • Missing from any domestic violence stats are that of mothers hitting, beating and even killing their children. Hitting a child, surely this is domestic violence it is witnessed in any supermarket or high street ( what goes on behind closed doors God only knows ) but because the violence is coming from a woman it did not happen.

      • I believe that around 30 children per year in the UK are killed by their own mothers, or – “Every twelve days a child is killed by its own mother” – to use the domestic violence propagandists’ method of expressing statistics.

      • I seem to recall the BBC’s own survey (“Here and Now”, around the mid 2000s) showed that women were responsible for two thirds of all child abuse .

        Needless to say, the Bloke Bashing Corporation doesn’t publicize that finding much these days.

        • If you want solid factual analysis of child abuse, the most comprehensive records I have found anywhere are from the website of the US Centres for Diseases Control and Prevention (CDC), the official national public health institute. I cannot post the hyperlink, but below is the URL of the Child Maltreatment Report for 2012, prepared by the Department of Health and Human Services and quoted by the CDC. I think 2012 is the latest year available. There is an absolute mass of detailed analysis of victims, deaths and perpetrators of child abuse across the entire USA for the entire year. The tables in sections 3 to 5 provide as much information as you could ever need. What a pity other countries, including to our shame the UK, are nothing like as diligent in compiling and making available such information in the public domain – which allows ignorance, assumptions and prejudice to take the place of fact.

          For the record, in 2012 perpetrators of child abuse across the board were 53.5% female and 45.3% male, with 1.1% unknown (table 5.3)

      • Women are the majority perpetrators of all forms of child abuse; some forms are committed almost wholly by women. Feminism is the OPPOSITE of truth. All Leftist philosophies are.

  2. I have witnessed the effects of controlling and coercive behaviour against a 73 year old man. Systematically severing his links with family and friends, taking advantage of his limited mobility and creating a fantasy world where she would refer to her own children as ‘ours’. In hindsight the signs were there and I would ask readers here to be aware that this also effects older generations. In this case, the threat of reporting her to the police and a potential 5 year prison spell worked.

    • You raise a really really important point. As you may understand generally the female partner is younger. It remains so that often it is the daughter who provides care in various forms and of course paid help is most frequently female. It is one of those “inconvenient” truths of life that older men are particularly vulnerable to female abusers for the simple fact they often rely on women and authorities share our societal reluctance to prosecute women.

      • I believe its this ‘reliance’ that’s the heart of the problem. Having asked him to move in with me, he refused, saying he didn’t want to be a burden. I had no option but to threaten going to the police.

  3. Why do you refer to men as males and women as women?

    I am not a male, I am a man.

    Feminists use that tactic to dehumanize us. Please stop it or at least be consistent.

  4. I am a 6′ 2”, well built man. In the 1970s, in the early years of my first marriage, my then wife used regularly to attack me and once threatened me with a knife. I finally swallowed my scruples and told her that the next time she hit me, I would hit her back twice as hard. This came to pass and solved the problem. I suppose that, in this day and age, I would be regarded by feminists as the abuser.

    • Be careful. You are not only inevitably the abuser, but the long passage of time is no barrier to an accusation that becomes true the second it is uttered, and to furious social punishment that needs nothing more than an accusation to be unleashed.

        • I would not usually comment so directly but please do be careful. As a general point from working with the police on this issue its vitally important that men in particular use mobile phones recording abilities to record as much as possible of what transpires. Police officers understand the tendency of courts to discount men’s testimony and so strongly advise on taking all steps to record, record, record.

          • My experience was that police had no interest whatsoever in the fact that I kept records for thirty months and that I told them my wife pleaded with me to delete them. All they were interested in was trying to find grounds to convict me. Nevertheless, I recommend doing so.

  5. Many different facets to this issue, too many to discuss properly here without writing reams. But a few thoughts.

    The relentless narrative of man=abuser and woman=abused still has a very powerful grip in the media and apparently in the public consciousness. Even when men are seen as being abused, they are still highly likely to be labelled wimps; while female abusers are still afforded credit as being “empowered”.

    If the definition of domestic abuse really is to be extended to include coercive and controlling behaviour of all types, I wonder just how far that definition will be allowed to extend. Will it include emotional manipulation in all its guises, ranging from nagging to outright blackmail? The use of sex to control, punish and reward? Low level violence such as slaps, throwing water in the face, pushing, damaging clothes and other possessions? Verbal attacks, corrosive criticisms, shaming in front of others?

    You may recognise these as the types of abuses most likely to be deployed by women against men. You may also recognise them as extremely unlikely ever to be the cause of complaints by men to the police, to the media, to any authority or to any charity or campaigning group. No wonder Professor Westmarland can be confident that more female victims will be identified, and the “reporting gap” between the sexes will widen. I get the impression that this is very much the purpose of the exercise, and the erasing of men from the figures will be most welcomed by organisations like Womens Aid who stand to profit by it.

  6. I think it’s very hard to get certainty on the extent of domestic violence, but I think that most of the perpetrators are men. Certainly in my experience all the perpetrators have been men. My grandfather was an abuser, regularly hitting my grandmother. He also singled my mother out and until she left home at 20 he would punch and beat her. The trauma followed her the rest of her life and she always lacked self confidence and self worth. As a child I also witnessed an uncle – drunk and raving – punch my mother in the face knocking her off her feet. A gentle soul herself, she came from a family of abusers. I have also encountered abuse outside my family, for example once having to call the police, hearing my downstairs neighbour screaming in terror as her (male) partner beat her and smashed things up. She was heavily pregnant at the time.

    What strikes me is that ‘feminists’ do seem to take practical steps to help abuse victims. For example I have a Pakistani friend who has helped set up a refuge for abused women from her community. Men’s Rights Activists seem to continually chant ‘what about the men, what about the men’, and do absolutely nothing of practical worth to back up their concerns. In fact their entire energy seems more directed at deprecating feminism rather than helping male abuse victims. But hey what do I know?

    • Because as a species, we simply don’t care about men. If one man can impregnate 50 women, who needs the other 49 men, amirite? So the pleas fall on deaf ears. It isn’t that MRAs aren’t shouting loud enough, it’s that society in general just ignores them.

      When Erin Pizzey started the Chiswick Refuge in the early 1970s, she was given a house by an anonymous benefactor. Given a house. Nobody will give men anything. We have to earn it, doubly so as “progressive” dogma asserts we have all the advantages to begin with, and turns a blind eye to the challenges we face, using simplistic beliefs about men and women (like all the bad is on one side, all the good is on the other).

      Earl Silverman was driven to suicide in Canada because his campaigning was simply ignored by the authorities. Try it for a few days. Ask your MP what they think about domestic violence. My own MP refused to listen to me. He was indoctrinated into the same one-eyed view of the facts that you are. Despite survey after survey (see the main article above) our society simply refuses to recognise male victims.

      We’ve been too indoctrinated to see the other half of the story.

      • We should also note that “males”, even white ones, can be both physically and mentally vulnerable at different stages of their lives.

        My memories of my first primary school teacher (female) are not pleasant ones. I remember being belted round the bare legs with a ruler for being a bit slower than others to get my books out of my desk (I used to be a bit dreamy). Other people I have mentioned this to, both men and women, have had similar stories about women teachers.

        Old men in care homes are not immune from abuse, and a good proportion of the abusers are women. It seems to be becoming increasingly common to read about female professional carers who have abused their charges or stolen from them.

        • All true. If people can get away with it, they abuse others. People abuse people they have power over.

          Feminists would have us believe in the simplistic equation “Men have all the power, therefore they commit all the abuse”.

          It’s an unrealistic view of human nature, informed by a Marxist dialectic of “Them and Us”.

          • May I point you to Mankind in England, AMIS in Scotland and AMEN in Northern Ireland which are the leading charities supporting men. There are other smaller regional organisations and all struggle for funds compared to the well known “giants” REFUGE and Womensaid

          • Irrelevant – staged and edited. I do not dispute women can be abusive. The question is the extent. For example CPS figures show that approximately 10 times as many men are convicted for domestic violence as women.

          • Obviously there are two actors, but nothing else was staged and managed. CPS drive home the “Violence against Women and Girls” agenda and police do need to deal with abuse against women. It goes too far when it means abuse against men is more or less ignored. Police still tend to ignore what a woman does in their bid to find something for which they can convict the man,. When he eventually cracks because of years of abuse, (an example of bidirectional violence) the police and CPS seek a conviction against the man regardless of how measured the man, in his desperation, tried to make his response. Police then choose to ignore a man’s evidence against his partner, because it would make conviction of the man more difficult.

        • lol I had the experience of having Sister Paul (imagine how confusing that was) thrash me round the legs with a ruler on my second day at school. But that was it till I was 7, and handed over to the Christian Brothers. Believe me if you really want sadism and cruelty, the Brothers were the lads to hand it out.

    • Personal anecdotes are a very poor basis for general assumptions. Can I suggest that perhaps you are more aware of males as abusers because any abusive behaviour by females would not have registered with you even if you had seen it, and would therefore have been easily forgotten? The sight of a woman slapping a man’s face or hitting him with an object is usually only a source of laughter, and quickly dismissed.

      And if you think feminists are really concerned with all abuse victims, men as well as women, then you have a lot to learn on the subject. Listen to Erin Pizzey, probably the leading authority on the subject, and certainly the one with the most experience of the feminist interference in the domestic abuse industry. They issued repeated death threats against Erin and drove her out of the UK because she had dared to point out that the women she took in to her first centre were, in many cases, just as violent as the men they were getting away from. Hers is an ugly and bitter story that ought to be required reading for anyone who purports to know anything on the subject.

      As for men’s activists actually trying to do anything to help abused men, why should it only be down to them? They are doing a good job trying to raise awareness and get the issue on the public map, because sure as hell virtually nobody in authority is doing so, and it is a tough uphill battle to get anyone to listen, let alone lend a hand to help or put a penny into supporting any refuge. This is why there are hardly any for men. Quite a few people are trying, but they have few resources and plenty of enemies. They should not be mocked because they are struggling to be heard and cannot get any official support.

      • Well said. The whole point of the Feminist DV industry is to increase violence against women, blame the root cause on men and keep the cycle going. Polly Neate, CE of Women’s Aid, earns more than the PM. Funnily enough, I just read that she’s stepping out to head up a major homelessness charity – where she will ensure more women are made homeless so she can sell the poor things as victims of masculinity. There’s no hell hot enough for people like her.

        • “she’s stepping out to head up a major homelessness charity – where she
          will ensure more women are made homeless so she can sell the poor things
          as victims of masculinity”

          As homeless men far outnumber their female counterparts, I think it’s very noble of her to attempt to even the score.

        • Very well aware of this, thanks. Similar experiments have been conducted in other countries, all with the same results – a woman being abused needs help, a man being abused needs to be laughed at.

    • Its actually not hard to be pretty certain in the UK because the ONS has been publishing statistics and briefings for decades as it has been a policy priority for nearly 50 years. This BBC does a reasonable job of introducing the latest ONS data The creation of a specific offence in the 2015 Serious Crime Act is new , previously no specific offence existed it was prosecuted under general offences Assault ,Stalking etc. with cases presumed to have a “Domestic” aspect recorded as Domestic Abuse by the Police or CPS. It tends to be the latter Police records that get in the headlines as these can fluctuate considerably.

      • Certainty is hard to come by partly because definitions and reporting guidelines continually change, but also because a lot of abuse goes unreported. I don’t dispute that men are victims of domestic violence, but I have widely varying claims as to the proportion of men who are victims. Most statistics seem to support the view that female victims of abuse are by far the majority. For example CPS

        • Think youy are right here but if you see my comment above we have a real view of why Men do, for the most part, keep quiet. I think that whilst Women find more Help available to them, which in turn enables or convinces them to consider themselves a ‘Victim’, on the whole Men do not want to be labelled a ‘Victim’, it is a Man thing and understandable.

          • I appear to have been a bit “geeky” here but I just wanted to add. Part of the not being a victim is also a powerful socialisation to “protect” So as you say many such men also believe they are protecting the children and in some cases to protect the perpetrator. The latter may appear surprising but along with the wider society male partners are far more likely to believe their abusive partner is “ill”. Alcohol and Drugs play a large part in Domestic Abuse and men in particular feel they protect by avoiding seeking punishment for their abusive partner. I truly wish we could escape the “gendered” view of this issue as there really could be some better results for women men and their children if public bodies would deal with what is, rather than what is politically popular.

        • The CPS have statistics on reported crimes. This of course relies on people perceiving there is a crime, reporting it , the Police then also perceiving it is a crime and then resourcing its investigation putting it to the CPS if they feel there is the prospect of a conviction. So in fact CPS figures reflect considerable “filtering”. Now given that there have been decades of campaigns on this and the past three Governments have a Violence against Women and Girls Strategy which requires the Police and CPS to prioritise work with women it is inevitable that there is a public policy effect. We will see a similar effect as there is now (from 2015) an actual offence that can be prosecuted, of course this doesn’t mean that prior to 2015 the behaviour didn’t exist.
          The ONS has through the BCS and other instruments been pretty consistent over many years and the proportions and numbers have actually remained fairly consistent with a general trend downwards (despite a widening of criteria and population increase) over the past three decades. I think it highly likely that the ONS data sets are pretty reliable. As you will see there is indeed a majority of female victims but a substantial proportion of males. As has been commented on, research indicates the mismatch reflects the lower likelihood of men to perceive their abuse as a crime and the perception that reporting it will not result in anything (sadly true though in recent years some police forces have tried to improve this).Thus the CPS is likely to honestly report its figures but will also reflect the underreporting.

        • I’m not surprised a lot of domestic abuse by women goes unreported. The police have a terrible attitude to men who claim they are abused. I say that through bitter experience. The officer laughed at me.

    • MRA is a marginal organisation that regularly have their meetings canceled due to threats of violence. Feminists have thousands of organisations promoting their causes, massive budgets and are de-facto an arm of the state by this point. You can’t really compare them.

      As for the perpetrators and victims of DA, the stats are being published by office for national statistics, you can find them here:

      In 2015-2016, for adults aged 16-59, 7.7% of women and 4.4% of men were victims of DA (including partner abuse; non-partner family abuse – i.e. from parents and siblings; sexual assaults and stalking).

      While women are being abused far more often then men, the total numbers are not extreme, and the gap is not that big (except for sexual assault, where it’s almost five-fold) – in fact, young men more often experience family abuse (i.e. beatings) than women do.

      Furthermore, both abusers and victims cluster around certain traits. I.e. if you are a white single mother co-habiting with an unemployed Black Caribbean man in a council flat, your chances to be abused are way above the average. See my post above.

  7. France’s Emil Macron has announced that the enforcement of full male/female equality will be one of the priorities of his presidency, mobilising schools, the police and the health service. “France must no longer be a country where women are afraid” and “the street cannot be a daily hell for women,” he said. French police, armed with a new offence called “sexist outrage” will crackdown hard on public harassers with on-the-spot fines. The education system will teach equality and women’s rights from nursery level. Hospitals will specially create “psycho-traumatic treatment units”, paid for by social security, to help women who are victims of domestic violence. Macron said 123 women in France were killed by a partner or ex-partner in 2016.

    He makes the country sound like a war zone which no doubt in some areas, like the no-go Parisian and Lyon suburbs where the French don’t live, it is; but smearing the entire country as “hellish” for women is surely an exaggeration. His measures are at least more practical than Britain’s offence of ‘coercive and controlling behaviour’ which like so much of this kind of law is heavily subjective. The UK law gives police and social workers carte blanche to go after men who will have little defence. Probably many of those who fall into the net will deserve to do so but as usual, when the authorities are given powers open to abuse, these will be abused under pressure from activists and home office guidelines.

    Professor Westmarland expects a rise in complaints of domestic violence but the opposite is likely to be true if women fear their breadwinners are more likely to be jailed or banned from the family under stricter laws if they call the police. Better a black eye than the welfare office queue. We already have all the law we need to cope with domestic violence without inventing ever more narrowly defined offences that will make no real difference to the women at risk but make politicians look like they’re doing something. Wolf-whistling is a trivial irritant compared to the harassment of women for the clothes they wear by men who will never be tackled by the police for ‘sexist outrage” because they have religious impunity.

  8. This isn’t news and it isn’t even nearly correct. Newly-published CSEW figures on domestic abuse tell us practically nothing here, primarily because CSEW data in the matter comes from self-reporting – and definitions of abuse are now so broad and gynocentric that a husband who refuses to let his wife take everything he has can be classed as an “abuser.”

    Throughout the history of study in this subject, male under-reporting and female false-reporting have both both colossal. Even in the softest settings, those most conducive to “opening up”, men are still highly unlikely to accede to victimhood at the hands of a female partner. Sadly, all too many women are prone to simply make this stuff up, knowing that several enormous criminal enterprises will side with them for their own gain.

    Thankfully, the raw science underpinning the uncomfortable truth, though barely known or shared for fear of contravening a violently-enforced Socialist narrative, is comprehensive and beyond refutation: domestic abuse – that is mate-control, partner coercion, violence and aggression – is almost wholly female-perpetrated. It’s simply hard-wired into our species as it is in some others. That’s not to say that all females are so inclined, of course, nor that there are not males violent within the home, but DV is female-perpetrated and male DV is aberrant and de facto. It’s an incontravertible, biological fact.

    Neurologists recently made a discovery that *should* have been lauded as the most pivotal uncovering in human science since Crick & Watson’s DNA double-helix, but you’ve probably never even heard of it for obvious reasons: a pathway that’s present only in the male brain, that only responds to the close presence of a female, which curbs male aggression. We are driven not only *not* to assault females, but back away in deference from female violence, which almost always is the case.

    Feminist mantra here is simply projection; a simple inversion of fact along the sex axis that conflates natural, competitive male-male violence with what they allege to go on “behind closed doors.” Feminists at executive levels in the DV industry actually know the truth, many of them violent lesbians themselves, but sell the mirror opposite to a lapdog-esque male public to perpetuate domestic abuse, for their own profit, grasping perfectly well that enforcement of their ludicrous model traps men – never women – in violent relationships and can aggravate situations that would cause men to hit back; even kill. Ergo, it is the avowed aim of Feminists to hurt and kill women by proxy to market a supply of avertible female victims to the public.

    All sources cited in the meta-analysis below:

    • I do have to agree with you. As a Taxi Driver for 40+ years I have lost count of the number of Men who are either afraid to go home sometimes or who I have picked up to go to refuge either at a friends, Mums, or in a few cases to Hospital for stitching up and being put together again. The majority are to ashamed to admit what is going on in their Life, but some have confided their story, when I have asked ‘Why do you stay?’ they all said, ‘I love my Kids, what if she takes it out on them if I’m not there – I’d rather she hit me than them?’ This is a very sad and disturbing fact of Life – Unfortunately.

  9. There is of course always a difference between the data for populations and Police figures because the latter reflect policy (particular campaigns such as this year’s crackdown on drug gangs in Gt Manchester). Following a slow start with the new offence of Domestic Abuse (there is no offence of domestic violence it is a category applied in recording crimes such as Assault etc.) police forces this year were told to prioritise using the new Act.

    The Office for National Statistics regularly has reported on Domestic Abuse and this BBC report actually gives a good overview. Though of course its headline trumpets “10% of young Women” it points out that 7% of young men also have experienced DA. The report goes on and in it we find that the historic falling trend in the population continues (as opposed to the fluctuating Police figures). One of the truly remarkable things about the issue of Domestic Abuse over the many years I’ve been involved is the way official data regularly produced which should guide policy, at least by the Gov. which pays for the research, is in fact ignored. Their work over the years also regularly confirms the unsurprising, such as that women abusers are far more likely to use an object as a weapon and this is most likely to be a kitchen implement. That domestic abuse is least likely in married couples and most likely at or just after a couple’s” break up” . And that there is a high correlation with debt, drug addiction, alcoholism and other criminal activity including violence. Finally of course that the cases of repeated abuse over time within a relationship form a small proportion of the ONS and other data sets which ask about an incident in a year or “ever”.
    Far from “hidden” Domestic abuse has been the subject of high profile public policy initiatives from Erin Pizzey’s ground breaking Refuge in the 1970s (She is still alive and campaigning as she always as for both women and men)
    It has consequently been extensively researched (mainly focussed on abuse of women)with more research on men and same sex abuse following Professor Archer of Lancaster University s massive studies at the turn of the Century.
    In a sense the creation of the offence Domestic Abuse in the 2015 Serious Crimes Act gives us first opportunity to see haw many actual cases there may be, as before the recoding was based on assuming some general offences were “domestic”. In its first year (perhaps inevitably for a wholly new offence) there were few cases but as a result the Police and CPS have been told to use the offence much more. So one is very likely to see a sharp rise.

  10. The main problem with the modern approach to domestic abuse is, the state can’t target the groups where it flourishes. It’s rampant among specific communities and classes, but – hey, you can’t say that. All you can do is to blame all men – or all people.

    Apparently, abusers do not care a single bit about shaming articles in newspapers. Usually, they do not read papers or anything at all. So all the rage is efficiently being directed at law-abiding middle-class men, fuelling the feeling of unfair treatment, which eventually gives way to resentment.

    Domestic abuse is an issue (caused, as so many of social ills, by dissolution of the family), and it’s men who are by far the worst abusers – if you count bruises and broken bones, not harsh words. But we should target the social groups that abusers belong to, not just all men. What’s more important, we should also focus potential victims, informing people that some life choices significantly increases the probability of being a victim of abuse.

    You can check the stats on victim here:

    According to tables 4.10/4.11, your chances to be a victim of domestic abuse are high if you:
    * low income (17% female victims of abuse are from households living on less than £10k pa; 4.3% from £50k+ pa);
    * single parent (this alone causes QUADRUPLE increase in probability to be a victim of abuse – to 23.4% or almost one in four single mothers being abused);
    * co-habit (6.6% vs 3.6% married);
    * social renter (13.9% vs 5.1% owner occupiers).

    And the one you can’t talk about. Ethnicity. Lowest abuse data for Asians (except for Bangladeshi) and non-British whites. African Blacks are on par with whites (with African Black men being more frequently abused than African Black women!). And the outliers: Irish (non-partner family abuse) and Caribbean Blacks – especially mixed couples with white women, especially sexual violence (almost DOUBLE the rate compared to ANY other group).

    But we can’t say that, can we? We can’t warn women to avoid inter-racial co-habit and dissuade them from having kids out of wedlock. It will be disempowering. It will be controlling. Downright abusive!

    So let’s just keep quiet and allow them to be raped instead.

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