SO how is that whole ‘let’s support the lockdown’ treating you fellow conservatives? Has it turned out so well, or has it just given Bonkers Boris licence to threaten us with more curfews, more lockdowns and the Army? These were threats that were once reserved for tinpot dictatorships; now we have them in Britain. Well done you! You fed the monster and now the monster is coming for more.
Yes, I no longer do Twitter. Yes, it is difficult for me to write, as once I see a madman on the loose with a barrel of petrol in one hand and a box of matches in the other, as Bonkers Boris is, I tend to grab the kids and head for the bunker armed with just my Waitrose delivery passcode and toilet paper.
So that is what I have been doing over the last few months, protecting the kids, knowing that things were going to get worse before they got better. Why waste your time arguing with a tyrant, someone with delusions of military leadership as evidenced by his repeated use of military language? We will use more ‘firepower’, he threatens. By firepower he means shutting the schools, destroying your Christmas and bankrupting your small business.
But I have returned to say: I was right. I was right about Boris, I was right about Covid, and I was right about opposing the first lockdown. And now here are the conservatives trying to negotiate with a madman, a lunatic who thinks he can beat a virus. Okey dokey. Here on Planet Earth we all know it’s either herd immunity or destroying our way of life, society, our kids’ future and the economy, waiting for a vaccine that might never come.
The best bit, the really fun part, is how Bonkers Boris is actually blaming us for the virus. He is in truth breaking up with us, saying, ‘It’s not me, it’s you.’ It’s all your fault things are so bad. And there is nothing any of us can do – we are stuck living with this lunatic until the next election swings by.
So next time, listen to me. It will save you a lot of pain in the long run.