Monday, May 20, 2024
HomeLaura PerrinsLaura Perrins: I intend to get drunk. Twenty years from now

Laura Perrins: I intend to get drunk. Twenty years from now


Twenty years from now, I shall drink myself into oblivion in the comfort of my own home when the children have flown the nest. No amount of nanny-state shaming will prise my glass of merlot from my cold dead hands!

The latest shaming of women who enjoy a glass of wine falls onto the shoulders of the over-45s whose children have left home. Unusually, this shame campaign has hit upon every category of wimmin the last few months – the working mother, the full-time mother with her wine o’clock playdates, and now the empty nester.

I was outraged at the story of full-time mothers having a post school run glass of wine. Where are these play-dates, I asked myself? And why wasn’t I invited? I have been to many play-dates and none involved slugging back a sneaky chardonnay, more’s the pity.

But now we are told that once you have done with the nappies, the midnight feeds, the school runs, and the school exams and raised your brood, you are not even to have a glass of wine in celebration? Are you freakin’ kidding me people? I intend to spend most of my late 40s/early 50s in a drunken haze. To make up for my very sober 30s.

I have been either pregnant or breastfeeding for the last six years so drink very little. I don’t resent this; one must stay sober during bath time and homework time and story time after all. Today, I am told that I cannot even enjoy some wine with hubby at dinner in 20 years time? I don’t think so.

And don’t bother telling me it will take a few years off my life. I don’t care, I don’t care, do you hear! I see these headlines declaring how even my generation could live until 120. Why on earth do you think I want to live until 120, bar being with the kids and maybe grandkids? Seriously I am exhausted just thinking about it.

These health scare headlines are really ridiculous. The constant finger-wagging would make even the most sensible person turn to drink.

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