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Laura Perrins: Woman’s Hour’s new plan to poison marriages. A spreadsheet to expose lazy men


Are you prepared for some marital discord? Have you uploaded your laundry hardships on an Excel spreadsheet? If not, weep no longer as Woman’s Hour is here to wreck a few more marriages. It will, I kid you not, devote an entire week to “Chore Wars” from Monday October 6.

BBC Radio 4’s Woman’s Hour will even furnish us with a ‘chore war calculator’ so you can take time out of your busy day to determine how horrible your domestic life is and how rubbish your lazy, good-for-nothing husband is.

When I blogged previously about how feminists like to take the joy out of life, some people believed I was being unfair. Yet, what this insufferable week of moaning demonstrates is how the feminists take issue not just with chores per se, but anything that requires effort in the domestic sphere.

The feminists loathe any work in the private realm carried out by women, especially if it is done out of love for family, or dare I say it, husband. If you do this, you must be told that you are being given a raw deal and revolt is necessary.

Sure your victimhood is staring right there at you in your ‘war chore calculator’ – so get arguing. This is why Woman’s Hour is dedicating a whole week informing you how horrible your middle-class life is.

I have mocked before the idea of ‘spreadsheet equality’ and here it is writ large. Woman’s Hour tells us: “The calculator will enable listeners and their partners to find out who does what in the house, how much free time each member of the couple has, and how they compare to the rest of the population: is housework a cause of strife for them or are they a paragon of equality and teamwork?”

I hazard a guess, Woman’s Hour, that if domestic chores are causing strife most couples already know this and do not need you to ‘put things right’.

I am not saying that husbands and indeed older children and teenagers should not pull their weight – but in what form that comes is really up to them. Also, I am not too surprised that if even after 40 years of brow-beating and feminist nagging, men are still a bit slow to do all the chores in the house in the exact dictated way the feminists would have them do it. I could have told you this years ago and saved you a lot of pain.

I do think life is too short for spreadsheets and that if you have reached that stage you are in trouble, or are listening to too much Woman’s Hour.

They also ask: “Has Betty Friedan’s unfulfilled housewife just been replaced by a generation of women struggling to cope with too much to do both in and out of the home? Careers, social status and even your sanity can all be affected by this.”

Well, Woman’s Hour, you and your fellow feminists were the ones who told us women could have it all. Unsurprisingly, it turns out that having it all at the same time can be quite tiring, exhausting and in fact ‘affect your sanity.’ I know what impacts upon my sanity – listening to tripe like this.

Finally, I do hope there will be an entire Excel spreadsheet devoted to all the work the hired cleaners do. I have one and I am sure most of the women making their way into Woman’s Hour have one also.

Are the cleaners paid fairly, is their work acknowledged or do we just write them off as ‘the help’? I trust there will be programme dedicated to these women and their efforts in lightening the laundry load of Middle England. But I do not hold my breath.

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