Wednesday, May 29, 2024
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Leftie Lunacy: A period of transition


CHILDREN as young as eight are to be taught at schools in Leftie Brighton (where else?) that boys as well as girls can have periods.

All lavatories (I presume they are still segregated between girls and boys, although who knows?) must contain sanitary waste disposal units.

The instructions are in guidelines from the council on ‘Taking a Period Positive Approach in Brighton & Hove Schools’. They claim there is ‘more work to do across all settings to prevent and reduce stigma related to periods and talking about periods’.

Teachers are told to stress to pupils that ‘trans boys and men and non-binary people may have periods’ and that ‘periods are something to celebrate and we can see this in ceremonies and celebrations across the world’.

The guidelines go on: ‘All pupils and students from year 4 (eight-to-nine-year-olds) receive appropriate period education within a planned programme of relationships and sex education.’

However, they demand schools take a ‘cross-curricular approach to learning about periods, particularly in science and PSHE but also in media studies, PE, maths, graphics, and textiles’.

Blimey! Writing as a former innocent who had no idea women had periods until I was at least 12, and would have been happy not to know it for a long time after that, my mind boggles at the implications of these bonkers edicts from the council, which still has a major Green element although Labour is in minority control.

For a start, what do they think will happen to the sanitary waste disposal units in the boys’ bogs? In the absence of tampons, heaven only knows what disgusting items will be deposited there by the little darlings.

And as for the cross-curricular approach, how will this affect science lessons? It will certainly give new meaning to the periodic table. PE? A godsend for the boys who want to dodge footie. ‘Sir, I can’t go in the goals today because it’s my time of the month.’ Maths? If X is 3 and T is 7, how much do Tampax cost? Textiles? Let’s not go there.

Meanwhile in the US, at Washington State University, they are similarly obsessed with the monthly curse (or blessing, depending on your viewpoint). The men’s lavatories are to be stocked with free menstrual products.

One of the students, to his credit, said he found the idea of equipping male khazis with tampons and sanitary napkins ‘pretty ridiculous’ and a symptom ‘that we live in a clown world’.

It could be worse, young man. At least you’re not in Brighton.

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Alan Ashworth
Alan Ashworth
Alan Ashworth is a former national newspaper journalist now retreated to the Ribble Valley, where he grows cacti and tramps the fells. He and his wife Margaret run a website, A-M Records , which includes their collected TCW columns plus extra features including Tracks of the Day. Requests, queries and comments can be sent to

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