The Bank of England has pledged to banish ‘gendered language’ from its documents. Offensive terms include ‘chairman’, ‘his’ and ‘her’.

So where would this leave erstwhile governor Mervyn King? Will history be rewritten to rename him Mervyn Monarch? It is also unclear how it will affect the Bank’s nickname of 300 years’ standing, the ‘Old Lady of Threadneedle Street’.

Old Person Who Identifies As Female Of Threadneedle Street? Oh no, that still leaves ageism rearing its ugly head! Ugly? Now we’re being appearanceist too! Where will it all end?