In Hollywood, everyone you meet, from doormen to doctors, wants to know how you can help get their screenplay seen by the right person.
In London, it’s the opposite. Every actor has a radical manifesto they’re working on, that ‘needs a wider audience’.
In the spirit of public information, The Conservative Woman has commissioned me to write an instruction manual: How To Act Your Way Onto the Political Stage
You, too, can escape your humdrum existence of bleak Stanislavski-style discipline and preparation, and embark on the Angelina Jolie of a lifestyle, travelling the world, staying at the finest hotels and lecturing on poverty.
You will learn the secrets of vital disciplines, such as:
How to suspend voter disbelief
Projection – Casting yourself as the hero in a world of beatable villains
The Blair school of method acting – Once you can convince yourself you are The Messiah, the audience will go with you
We will also reveal the four stages of an actor’s trajectory from:
Stage One: (to comedy club audience) What about those bankers, eh?
To Stage Four: (to agent) What about a banking advert, eh?
The book will provide easy-to-adopt tips on strategy. These include:
The rule of threesomes
The power of paradox
And, most crucially, Why you must always, always, enter stage left.
To reserve your copy, call me NOW on Oh Wait, Oh Wait, Oh Wait, Is-This-A-Rip-Off ?