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Pick of our readers’ comments: Oui, Prime Minister


IN response to John Hayter: Is this Brexit deal really the best that Johnson could get? shred wrote:

The whole story is like a very long episode of Yes, Prime Minister. Following four years of treacherous undermining of the referendum by the evil female double agent PM who seized power from Hacker, when he was stabbed in the back by his running mate, he returns with his ‘oven-ready’ reheat of the treacherous deal written by the Commission.

With a historic victory at the polls, after promising to deliver independence, Hacker appoints tough civil servants to work with him to face down the bullying continentals, who thought they had reduced the UK to a colony. Just when it appears that the UK can face them down, Hacker’s new girlfriend, whom he had put in the club, becomes involved and falls out with the civil servants. He sacks them and employs her remainer friends to keep her happy, leaving only one talking to the chief Frog, who is threatening to starve the UK into submission. To help matters along, his minister for health tells the world that the country has become a leper colony and every other country blockades us, resulting in 4,000 trucks stuck in Kent, where civil servants have forgotten the toilets for the parking area.

Hacker takes over the talks at the last minute and Sir Humphrey pulls out a master plan, agreed privately with his opposite numbers in Bruxelles and Berlin. Everything is agreed and we are free to write our own laws and control our own seas. These laws will be implemented over five years and we agree that our laws will be the same as their laws, unless we wish to change anything, in which case the laws will be agreed by committees of civil servants on both sides, who will adjudicate on the definition of the qualifications of the committee members and whether the law alters the level playing field, which includes social, environmental, taxation and financial policy plus everything else.

Hacker is delighted about the environmental policy because he has been listening to his girlfriend, who is a Green Party Conservative and has convinced him that the country can be powered by 15,000 huge windmills built in the sea, making the UK the Saudi Arabia of free energy. Hacker looks forward to being the world leader of the Green Reset at the conference in Scotland, providing the Scots haven’t left the UK by then.

Sir Humphrey smirks. Titles roll.

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