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Rob Slane: Madonna so loves the world that she wants to blow up the White House


It’s an interesting phenomenon that despite the multitude of pop songs over the past few decades encouraging us to love one another more there appears, if anything, to be less love in society than before the love song movement began. Perhaps the problem is that the rest of us just haven’t taken their words seriously enough, and so consequently we have ended up with an increasingly divided, broken society.

Whatever the reason, you might think that the results would have discouraged the starlets, but no. Despite the disheartening results of their labours many of them continue to plough a lone furrow in the world, exhorting us through their songs and their speeches to choose love over hate, like what they do.

One of those who has been particularly tireless in the cause of telling people how much they should love one another more is the grandmother of pop starlets, Madonna Louise Ciccone. Her latest attempts to make the world a better place occurred when she took to the stage at the “Women’s March on Washington,” and in a rousing sermon, once again urged us to choose the path of love over hate. In fact, she went even further than that, and as she spoke to a crowd of women with pink genitalia hats who said they loved women so much that it is their fundamental right to kill future women if they so choose (and future men of course), she announced the dawn of the “Revolution of Love”:

“Are you ready to shake up the world? Welcome to the Revolution of Love. To the rebellion. To our refusal as women to accept this new age of tyranny. Where not just women are in danger but all marginalised people. Where people uniquely different might be considered a crime. It took us this darkness to wake us the f*** up.”

Interesting take on love, you must admit. Not exactly this:

“Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things” (1 Corinthians 13:4-7).

Actually it turns out that the Love in the Revolution of Love isn’t very patient at all. Not to mention being plainly rather rude. Oh and it uses the f-word. Yes of course it does. One of the hallmarks of love, as you probably knew already. Yet despite its rudeness and its coarseness, the Revolution of Love is both just and good:

“It seems as though we had all slipped into a false sense of comfort. That justice would prevail and that good would win in the end. Well, good did not win this election but good will win in the end.”

Madonna is on the side of justice and good, you say? I admit that I hadn’t previously considered this particular possibility, especially given her role of cheapening and degrading women down the years by dressing and acting like a glorified prostitute in front of millions of adoring young females on the lookout for a role model. But then as a happily married and thoroughly starchy white male, I realise my observations on such matters must axiomatically be wrong and should be discounted on the grounds that they probably contravene some kind of hate speech codes.

After this, Madge went back to her charming and unmistakable message of pure love:

“And to our detractors that insist that this march will never add up to anything, f*** you. F*** you. Yes, I’m angry. Yes, I am outraged. Yes, I have thought an awful lot of blowing up the White House, but I know that this won’t change anything.”

You can hear the echoes of 1 Corinthians 13, can’t you: Love curses others. Love is angry. Love is outraged. Love wants to blow up buildings – presumably killing the Head of State. Spare a thought for poor old Guy Fawkes. We now know how misunderstood he has been all these years. Year after year people burn effigies of him, and only now we find out it was probably for Love’s sake that he tried to kill the King.

And finally, just in case those ladies in the genitalia hats demanding that they be allowed to keep on killing lots of future women forgot why they were there, Madge reminded them what the Revolution is all about:

“I choose love. Are you with me? Say this with me: We choose love. We choose love. We choose love.”

And of course the crowd chose love too.

Now I’ve heard it said that irony is not a particular specialty of Americans, and I partly believe it. But c’mon guys. You must get this, surely? Here we have a woman spewing out bile and calling it Love. Here we have a woman who has made a career of dressing in ways that play to the kinds of men who like “grabbing” certain things, preaching to a crowd of ladies wearing mock ups of those certain things on their heads, and they’re there to protest the man who once said he likes to grab those certain things. If you can’t see that irony on stilts and steroids right before your very eyes, then you’ll probably never see it!

The only thing missing from all this was Victoria Nuland – she of the Revolution of Dignity fame – handing out little pink cookies to signal yet another attempt to topple an elected leader and plunge a country into a needless crisis and a state of civil war. Though since Mr Soros is apparently linked to more than 50 groups represented on the march, and since everything he gets his grubby paws into soon goes kaput, I fear the cookies, the chaos and America’s very own Maidan may not be long in coming.

But let me end on a lighter note. Madonna is actually a bit late to the party. There already is a Revolution of Love going on. It happens when people repent of self-worship and instead give glory to the Triune God. And when they do that, a strange thing starts to happen. Suddenly the kind of love spoken of in 1 Corinthians 13 begins to happen. I’ve witnessed it many times in many churches. It doesn’t look much like the kind of Love we heard in the Gospel of Madonna. It really is patient and it really is kind. It really isn’t irritable or resentful or self-interested. But the good news is she’s welcome too. Even Madonna. All she needs is true repentance and she too can come and find that love which bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.

(Image: Jonathan Eyler-Werve)

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Rob Slane
Rob Slane
Rob is married to Alina, and they live with their six children in Salisbury. He blogs regularly at

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