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Monday, August 8, 2022
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HomeNewsSituations vacant at the BoJo Academy

Situations vacant at the BoJo Academy

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PARENTS might have heard on the grapevine that the Chairman of the Governors, Mr Dowden, has resigned. Neither a surprise, or indeed a disappointment, coming as it does on the back of a distinctly lacklustre performance in what is, when all said and done, a largely ceremonial role at the BoJo Academy. Older boys will recall that in an earlier post Mr Dowden oversaw Media Studies; even in this quintessentially undemanding position he repeatedly failed to engage with his charges.

Out of compassion and loyalty, the Headmaster arranged his removal from front-line duties and handed him a plum sinecure. What a pity Mr Dowden, or Mr Responsible, as he has taken to referring to himself, exhibits no similar qualities. We wish him well in whatever career he finds and the Headmaster stands ready to give a flattering reference to potential employers.

In a similar vein Mr Geidt, who did such sterling work in drawing up the school rules, has also felt the burdens of office too great to bear and has stood down. We wish him well too.

Applicants for either post should in the first instance submit their CV via the usual channels. Please note that preference will be given to those who supported the Headmaster at the recent PTA meeting.

Flights aplenty!

Whilst keeping one eye firmly on his carbon footprint, the Headmaster has been busy in fulfilling several important overseas trips on behalf of the school. A successful excursion to Kiev Boys’ School was followed up with a trip to the Commonwealth Schools’ Association and a stopover in Rwanda. Here he was able to see first-hand the more-than-comfortable dormitories where exchange pupils will be housed. Exiting one such residence he summed up the mood exclaiming, ‘Crikey, these dorms are better than Eton!’

There followed a brief stopover in Munich to talk with representatives of the European Schools Alliance about security and heating systems. With an emphasis on more robust measures to keep difficult pupils under control, the Headmaster was able to bring his considerable experience and expertise to a wider and appreciative audience.

Music aplenty!

A good friend of the school, Farmer Eavis, very kindly lent his lower field for a musical get-together at the weekend. The weather was kind and locals heard from a variety of bands. Festival-goers spotted (very) old boy Mr McCartney in the audience. With some gentle persuasion he was cajoled into going on stage and he gave a delightful acapella rendition of Back in the USSR; sadly the amplification system suffered a malfunction at exactly the moment he started singing.

A far more successful set came from a new wave Swedish group called Greta and the Stoogeswho electrified the audience with a medley of songs, including Blowin’ in the Wind, Windmills of Your Mind, Here Comes the Sun and Every Breaking Wave.

The finale was a triumph of son et lumiere. With Greta and the Stooges giving an awe-inspiring version of Conway Twitty’s classic It’s Only Make Believe, the sky lit up to a tremendous spectacle of silent fireworks and a co-ordinated drone display representing a melting iceberg and a crying polar bear.

Suitably impressed, assembled revellers gave a four-minute ‘jazz hands’ show of appreciation.

Special thanks go to the Prefects who kindly disconnected the diesel generators used to charge the electric vehicles in the car park.

On a more serious note, the food bank which the Headmaster set up for parents of boys on assisted places has been expanded to all pupils. We ask that parents wishing to avail themselves of this facility form an orderly queue.

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Alexander McKibbin
Alexander McKibbin
Alexander McKibbin is a retired media executive who worked across domestic and international media.

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