Sunday, May 26, 2024
HomeBrexit WatchStarting today: Your four-part guide to dysbrexia

Starting today: Your four-part guide to dysbrexia


DYSLEXICS – as readers of this column will know – are tragically undervalued.

Many protect us by working as code-crackers at GCHQ, where they spot anomalies and rogue patterns in electronic communication that most of us would miss because they see things differently. We should be grateful for the extra-sensory perception of ‘The DNA’ (the National Dyslexics Association).

However, there is a group that can be genuinely called ‘word blind’ – the Remainiacs. With their myopic focus imprisoned within oppressively narrow horizons, their bias has mutated into a form of unconscious word misinterpretation called dysbrexia.

Dysbrexics see any text and perceive it how they want. The letters might spell ‘diversity’ but they interpret that as a directive for ‘divisity’.

They don’t know a Catalan from the Sudetenland, but they can tell you exactly what Donald Trump has on his muffins. This is how they interpret the words ‘passion for Europe’. If they love Europe so much, why do they obsessively copy everything American, from culture to catch-phrases? If CNN  eats chilli, The Mash Report gets heartburn.

Nothing exemplifies dysbrexia more than the misinterpretation of the word Referendum.

The silent majority understand Referendum to mean a general vote, by the electorate, on a single political question which calls for a direct decision.

Dysbrexics see it differently.

It’s an invitation to violence.

A licence for bigotry.

A platform for self-elevation, not through their own good deeds, but by dragging the reputation of others through the mud.

Tomorrow we will examine in more detail the damage that this unpleasant condition can cause.

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Nick Booth
Nick Booth
Nick Booth is a freelance writer.

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