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Tuesday, April 16, 2024
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HomeCulture WarThe NHS chief teaching granny to suck Easter eggs

The NHS chief teaching granny to suck Easter eggs

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DR Andrew Kelso, the medical director at NHS Suffolk and North East Essex Integrated Care Board, has urged the public not to guzzle Easter eggs (or Gesture eggs as a retailer called Freshstore would prefer them to be known) all in one go.

He advised that they should be eaten ‘in moderation’ as the NHS braces for a busy Bank Holiday weekend.

The last thing the ‘envy of the world’ needs is sticky-fingered gluttons clogging up A & E with symptoms of chocolate overdose.

The good doctor has been criticised for not being specific in his advice. If we are to have trust in the pronouncements of NHS directors surely he should have elaborated.

We do not know if he is referring to a Mini Creme Egg or a Thornton’s Dinosaur. He did not say when we could finish the egg, nor whether we were allowed the supplementary bar that comes with the Aero egg. There was no mention whatsoever of chocolate rabbits.

And what of hot cross buns? How are we to know when, and how many, we are allowed? As for simnel cake we are completely in the dark.

Dr Kelso was also offering his sage advice last Christmas. Amongst his profound pronouncements was the following: ‘The regular washing of hands with warm water and soap is one of the best actions we can take to prevent the spread of germs.’ There can be no sympathy for the residents of Ipswich who ate their mince pies whilst unblocking the lavatory.

As well as delivering his views on chocolate consumption and hand washing, Dr Kelso last year enlightened us with his thoughts on the safe and effective mRNA jabs: ‘I want to remind and encourage all eligible people who have not yet come forward for their booster vaccination to do so.

‘Receiving the booster jab will increase your immunity against the virus and keep you and your loved ones protected.

‘Coronavirus still exists and remains dangerous and life-threatening for some, especially older people and younger people with long-term health conditions.’

In other news, the waiting list for NHS treatment is expected to reach 8million this year.

And a survey by British Social Attitudes shows overall satisfaction with the NHS has fallen to 24 per cent, the lowest since the research began in 1983. 

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John Ellwood
John Ellwood
John is the father of four beautiful girls. He is, thankfully, not knowingly related to Tobias Ellwood. ‘My Dear Friends . . . ’ a compilation of many of John’s contributions to TCW Defending Freedom is available in paperback and on Kindle.

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