Just how bad are the relations between the sexes? From reading a series Sexodus by Milo Yiannopoulos at Breitbart (part 2 here) they are at pretty low ebb, at least for some.
Yiannopoulos tells us that there is a sexodus: heterosexual men are retreating, not just from marriage but also from intimate relationships entirely. This has been written about before, particularly in America by Helen Smith in her book Men on Strike.
Peter Lloyd in his new book Stand by your Manhood also trashes marriage (although not relationships) as a great ‘fraud of the rings’ that only a crazy man would enter into.
This not only puzzles me, but as a social conservative, pains me greatly. I am wiling to accept that I live a ‘sheltered’ life here in nappy valley and have not experienced any of this personally.
The men around me spend much of their time running around after their two-year-old toddlers while carrying a newborn in a sling so I do find it a challenge to take these pieces at face value – but let’s go with it for now especially as both received huge feedback and support. Some men – a small minority – are opting out.
Yiannopoulos argues this male opt-out is very, very bad for women and I agree. Women may not want a serious relationship in their twenties but ultimately most desire to settle down and have children. Sure, they now have the option of going it alone – but women know this is not ideal. Yiannopoulos is correct when he states that men can go it alone more easily than women, whether in life in general and indeed sexually.
Yiannopoulos blames much of this sexodus on ultra-third wave feminists who trash masculinity and yet glorify their own victimhood to claim special privileges they no longer need. I would add that for men the old deal of getting married and supporting a family is first very difficult as wages continue to stagnate and there is very little status attached to it in any case. Witness Labour’s mocking of the ‘married man’s tax allowance’ because men getting married and supporting a family is shameful to Harriet Harp-on-and-on.
Yiannopoulos is certainly not going to get any argument for us on most of these points. Feminists trashing masculinity starts early in babyhood. Boys are not permitted to like blue and should be encouraged to play with dolls. It is wrong if they enjoy traditional boys toys.
‘Rough’ boys are now routinely drugged on a massive scale, especially in America, to fit in with feminised schooling (previously they would be on the farm) and accused of routine sexual assault as early as secondary school.
Just a few days ago feminist activist Caroline CiadoPerez tweeted, “There’s a very simple thing we can do to reduce violence: revolutionise the concept of masculinity. Why does no one consider this?” Yes, because masculinity is inherently violent, according to the feminists.
Previous generations of women did try to channel masculinity towards the protection of women but the feminists thought this was a bad idea. They just want masculinity to be ‘revolutionised’ by forcing men to embrace the feminine. No men-only clubs for men to blow off some steam. We all must sit around sipping lattes together instead – or else you are a misogynist.
We have written extensively on third wave feminists wallowing in their own victimhood at the expense of men thereby claiming ever more privileges. The latest is the claim of a ‘rape culture’ on campuses. The pinnacle of this misconceived campaign was the gender slander of an entire fraternity by Rolling Stone magazine whereby the magazine alleged a brutal and gruesome gang rape took place on a young woman. This has now been retracted, but still feminists persist.
Jessica Valenti thinks the presumption of innocence should not apply to men accused of rape and hundreds of years of common law tradition, whereby the prosecution bears the burden of proof, should be chucked in the bin. You are a man – you are guilty. All in all it should come as no surprise that some men have had enough.
However, in contrast to men exiting from relationships are those who put pressure on women to become akin to porn stars both in appearance and behaviour. What is a social conservative to do? Social conservatives have a big stake in this as we believe society will go to hell in a handcart if men give up on marriage and children.
But it is not just social cohesion that matters. It is the personal happiness of the next generation we must consider. As someone who has enjoyed great personal happiness from marriage and muchkins we must not let this be denied to others. That is not to say it is easy. But it is worthwhile.
Dating websites are heavily outnumbered by women (perhaps this confirms the sexodus). Sexodus men should know that not all women agree with the third wave feminists who want masculinity to be squashed. Many women do want a partner for life, and not on wholly unreasonable terms either. And remember you only have to find one! Just one. She is out there if you only put down the video game long enough to look.
