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Sarah Boulton-Jones: Why I care at home


I am a married mother of two girls, aged one and three and half years old. I resigned from my job as a city lawyer when I had my first daughter. I worked long hours and I always knew that this would be incompatible with how I wished to raise my family.

I am at home full time. My eldest daughter attends three afternoon sessions of pre-school. I have never in all this time wished that I was at work rather than being with my daughters.

I love spending time with my children. I love our days out, our afternoons in the park, or walks in the countryside. We spend hours together reading, playing, role playing, making things and chatting. I love our daily routines we have set up together.

Nothing has given me so much joy as seeing the wonderful relationship that is developing between my girls. This would not be the same if they were in a nursery, as they probably would be separated.

People frequently comment on what good little friends they are already and I am sure this must be due to the fact that they are together all day. I hope this relationship will sustain them long into their own adult lives and after we are gone.

It can be hard to amuse two active children, day after day when stuck indoors. We make huge financial sacrifices for me to be at home.

I used to be the main breadwinner and we live in an affluent area where many of the other mums work full time, and yes, sometimes I feel envious of their houses and their two brand new cars. But then I look at my children and think of the things we have done that day and it soon passes.

My husband travels a lot in his job. When the girls were younger this could be really tough – the responsibility on me was massive, but his job pays the bills and enables me to be at home.

It is clichéd but it is true that I will never get this time to spend with my girls again. But this time together means that I know my girls inside out. I am there whenever a cuddle is needed, or a kiss to take away any pain. I am there for tickles, tears and toilet training. In other words, I am there for them, heart and soul.

Every day we are creating memories for us all.  My daughters have a contentment not present in all children and I strongly believe this is because they spend every day with one of the two people who love them and care about them more than anyone else in the world.

It does make me proud when others praise my girls’ manners and I do not think it is any coincidence that they have a mother at home.

Hopes for future: My eldest daughter starts school in September, and I can see that she will be ready for this. I can also see that she will need me so much to help her through this change as exciting as it will be for her.

It will be a challenge for both of us but I am sure that when school finishes I want her to come back to her Mum and her sister to the place she knows best: home.

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Sarah Boulton-Jones
Sarah Boulton-Jones
Sarah is a former City barrister and stay-at-home mother

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